My Quiet Zone

Mother’s Dilemma

August 13, 2008

I am constructing another blog site and it is basically done, except for some finishing touches.  I want to work on it again if only for the drowsiness brought about by my graveyard shift job. Nope, I’m not working, as in paid work per se.  I am servicing a working lady who works in a Call Center on a graveyard shift. And that lady is  Janina, my daughter. I drive her to her work place, since I worry too much for her safety if she   gets to commute alone during that graveyard hour.  The driver stint is not exclusively mine though.. The three of us (with the father and the big brother) are taking turns driving for her.  Perhaps, the father is getting tired of being waken up in the midst of deep slumber so he now pushes her to get her own driver’s license. The daughter loves the idea seeing the possibility that the second car would be given to her. But then, the mother, that’s deemed to always be on a character role, disagrees.  Just tell me, why shouldn’t I?   I can’t imagine her driving all alone by herself on deserted roads on midnights.  I don’t know!  I just can’t get rid of my mother instinct of over protectiveness.  For the father, it’s just all right. 

                                                                                 The car to drive.

 I hope you can help me.  What is your view on this little dilemma of mine? Please tell me what to do.  Should I or should I not agree to allow a 22 year old lady drive a Kia Carens car all alone by herself in the midnight hour, on a 10 kilometer distance of deserted road?  We’re here in Quezon City, Philippines, if that would help you to have an idea of our place.

Posted by ailecgee at 6:13 pm | permalink

Previous Comments

your such a great mother…. There’s no such thing as a perfect moo…. thanks for the vote (s)… hope youcan vote for me everyday… just dropped an ecard too… Thanks a lot!

Posted by PrettyLifeOnline at August 13, 2008, 9:17 pm

If I were your daughter I’d feel so very happy to have such a caring mom.
I’m at the same age with your daughter and so cannot give any idea from the viewpoint of a mother :D .
But I’m sure that in this case I’d do the same. I mean I’d ask to drive alone to work after a period of time depending on my mom, dad and brother. Of course I must be careful all the time. This would make me feel somehow less comfortable than before but I’d be proud that I can do it by myself. I guess after a short time my mom and dad won’t be worried about me any longer. :D
btw, I don’t know much about Quezon except that it bears the name of a President of your country. Am I right? ^^ Is it a safe place to live?

Posted by Linh at August 13, 2008, 10:35 pm

To Linh: ‘Glad to hear the view from the other side of the fence. Wow, you impressed me! You knew that our place, Quezon City is named after one of the Philippines’ presidents. It’s one big city here and would say that it’s not a perfectly safe place just like any other big cities in the world.

Posted by ailecgee at August 13, 2008, 11:02 pm

Hi there…

Tough tough question you have here. I can understand where you’re coming from. I don’t think you will ‘ever’ feel comfortable letting her drive alone especially in the middle of the night. Is she going to be on the graveyard shift for a long time?

Maybe she can get her license and drive herself to work once her shift changes. But I think it’s best if someone is with her [whether she’s driving or not] while she’s on the graveyard shift. Mahirap na.

Posted by Juliana at August 14, 2008, 12:42 am

To J: Unfortunately, she’d be forever in the graveyard shift coz they’re catering the states of Louisiana, Texas and the Central Southern States if I remember right. The possibility of normal time sked is very remote.

Thanks, you do understand my point. We’re Moms. And as the saying goes, “Mother knows best!

Posted by ailecgee at August 14, 2008, 1:11 am

Difficult situation you have. I understand your feeling. I think I will do the same too. I will drive her as long as I can.

Thanks for your comment in my blog, btw.

Posted by Fiori at August 14, 2008, 10:23 am

To Fiori: Thanks Fiori! I just hope I can see the best side of the situation, the win-win situation.

Posted by ailecgee at August 14, 2008, 12:18 pm

Tita Beng, I do understand ur concern. My father was very protective earlier too. Driving me here and there. But as a daughter I would really hope I can be independent and do things on my own rather than depending on people. Now when I know how to drive, I feel that I have more freedom and happy that now I can drive my father and mother everywhere :) …..

Parents, one of the hardest part is to let go. Of course you have your worries…understandable. But you can always asked her to do all the precaution, lock the doors, carry pepper spray, send a text message to you when she reaches office etc etc :) .

Just my thought…. :) …..anyway, your daughter will surely be very happy to have such a caring family :)

Posted by Piggy at August 15, 2008, 9:11 pm

To Piggy: That was what she’s pointing out. And after I have dropped her to her office, she would
ask me to text her when I reach home. She worries
too like I do. Hah!. . . really difficult! Also difficult for all of us, especially me who can’t sleep until she’s gone to work. If only she could find work with good pay in a regular time, it would have solved my problem. Anyway, I appreciate giving your viewpoint, PL.

Posted by ailecgee at August 15, 2008, 9:55 pm

Maybe she can carpool with other co-workers? She can pick-up a friend or another co-worker so she’s not alone driving?

Hmm… I don’t even remember what I was doing at age 22— and maybe you don’t want her to know! hehehe

Jay

Posted by jay at August 21, 2008, 6:25 am

To Jay: There are days when a friend of her would pick her up in going to work. That leaves us with some restful nights.

Well, I was young too, once upon a time and had lots of good times. You knew that! I’m not depriving her of that. As long as she’s safe and all are clean fun.

Posted by ailecgee at August 21, 2008, 9:17 pm

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